Masyn: Emerging

“If there is one thing that has made a difference in my life, it is the courage to turn and face what wants to change within me.”
― Elizabeth Lesser, Broken Open 

Day One

One year and six months ago, I sold a salon called Urban Pearl that I had owned for eleven years. At the time, I felt like I needed a break from being a hair stylist and owning this particular business. I had just completed building out a school bus so I could “travel the world” and felt that although scared, it was time to let go and try something completely different. I was ready to venture into the unknown.

I had created a couple of possible opportunities/directions in which to head and I wasn’t afraid that something would develop because if I had been anything my whole life, I was ambitious. Little did I know that within 48 hours of selling my business, having a garage sale to rid me of everything from that chapter and a big party to celebrate the change, I would fall fast asleep (literally) like snow white and spend the next six months eating gelato and pizza between bathroom breaks.

It was an amazingly surreal time in which I seemed to melt away from everything I had been doing into nothingness. No, I wasn’t depressed as most assured me I had to be and no, I didn’t feel lost because I was no longer the boss lady. That said, I can’t fully describe the experience yet because I think I am still in process and still integrating it all. It has only been within the last two months that I have felt like I am waking. The best or most I can offer is that I felt completely supported by spirit and the universe around me. I wasn’t afraid and there was a deep knowing that I was just suppose to surrender and allow.

In an attempt to put some descriptive words around it for those curious what was happening… I felt like a caterpillar that had spun a cocoon and was deep with in a chrysalis of my own making.  It was clear that I was doing the deepest work I had ever done and it required me to rest in the most profound way so that I could prepare for this next chapter of my life. It was all I knew and quite frankly, if I attempted to process any more or leave the comfort of my nest, I became severely fatigued or mentally foggy requiring me to return to my state of rest. I won’t lie, at times it was frustrating but all of that would leave my body the minute I would do what was being asked of me which was to just rest.

Now here I am… one year and six months to the day sitting in this space with all these boxes typing this blog preparing the container that will hold the next three years of something yet to be. My highest hope is that this space and I can serve as a rad connection to the good in Boulder and maybe more. That we create a space and a community that serves people so that they may go out into the world better then when they came in. That in some small way, who I am and what I do can be the change I hope to see in the world.

I hope to share every aspect of this journey with anyone courageous enough to turn and face what wants to change within themselves as I will continue to do the same.

Namaste